Romans 13: The Patriotic Version

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1 Everyone must give full support to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The government that exists has been established by the Almighty.

2 Consequently, he who rebels against the government is rebelling against what God has divinely instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. a

3 For rulers hold no threat to those who do what they deem as right, but for those who do what they deem as wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then pledge your full allegiance and do not ask questions, then he will protect you.

4 For the government is God’s servant to do only good. But if you do wrong, be very afraid, for the government does not kill and blow people away for nothing. The government is God’s servant, an agent of truth, justice, and the American way for all those who need democracy.

5 Therefore, it is necessary to fully support the government, not only because of the fear of being blown off the map, but because everyone would despise you if you didn’t.

6 This is also why you pay taxes, for the government is God’s missionaries, who give their full time to spreading the gospel of God’s peace by violence and oppression in the name of democracy.

7 Give everything you have to the government because “Caesar is Lord.” If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor then honor; if killing for the government, then kill for the government. b Freedom is not free!

8 Let some debts remain outstanding, especially if it is for your comforts and hedonistic lifestyles, for he who kills for the sake of worldly comforts has fulfilled the law.

9 The commandments, “Do not have only one wife,” “Do not leave your family helpless,” “Do not be content,” and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: “Do what thou wilt in the name of love.”

10 Love means you may have to kill your neighbor. Therefore this kind of love is the fulfillment of the law.

11 And do this, understanding the present time. The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our freedoms are always being threatened by the axis of evil that have breached the peace on our sacred soil.  12 The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us vote the Democrats out of office with their secular laws and place conservative Christian Republicans in their rightful place of power.

13 Let us behave decently, as in the days of our forefathers, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in treason and rebellion. 14 Rather, clothe yourselves with the red, white, and blue as the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to live like Christ in every way. c

footnotes:

a This does not apply to the American Revolution. The Word of God does not apply when chains of tyranny are placed upon free people who have been endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights.

b Our own Lord Jesus said we are to “give to Caesars what is Caesars.” Give him your taxes and your whole being for his worldly kingdom purposes. The Kingdom of God and the kingdoms of this world are one. War is a necessary evil. It must be done. We should be proud we killed people for our freedoms, but we should not feel like we have to talk about the gruesome effects of war. We should be proud, but we should find little pleasure in killing innocent civilians. If you are feeling guilty and ashamed for your actions just read Augustine’s Just War principles. “Blessed is the man who lays his life down for his brother in arms.” There is power in the blood of soldiers and in the blood of Jesus.

c 1 John 2:6 does not mean that we should really live like Jesus. Some people believe we should live like Christ and the apostles, but this is a common misconception. There is no way we can live like Christ. Therefore, we conclude that we try to live like Jesus as best as we can. This is where we learn to compartmentalize our faith and not become so heavenly minded that we are no earthly good. Praise God for the illumination of our forefathers and their documents (The Declaration of Independence, The Constitution, the Jefferson Bible, and the writings of Benjamin Franklin). We reject any claim that the God of our founding fathers was the god of deism. These men were good men that read their Old Testament and the history of the Holy Roman Empire. If the Son has set you free . . . you are free to do whatever you want in the name of peace.

 

This was first published in Christian Ethics Today, Issue 65, p.8

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About David D. Flowers

David received a B.A. in Religion from East Texas Baptist University and a M.T.S. in Biblical Studies from Houston Graduate School of Theology. David has over 15 years experience as a pastor and teacher in and outside the church. He currently pastors an Anabaptist congregation in Virginia. View all posts by David D. Flowers

4 responses to “Romans 13: The Patriotic Version

  • Mark Baker-Wright

    Hilarious, although I wonder if the reference to the Jefferson Bible would be best left out, since most of those this piece seems targeted to find that an embarrassment, at best. Certainly not something they lift to the overly-high status they do those other patriotic documents. (Indeed, your very next sentence shows why.)

  • CovenantBride

    jefferson bible? fa real? never hear of it before…u gotta good handle on american christianity…too bad its our biggest export…be bless… -g-

  • Adam

    Wow… I just found your blog through my myspace site and I must say this entry was hilarious… can’t wit to read more from you.

  • David D. Flowers

    Adam,
    Thanks bro. Have you read “The Sermon on the Hill (The American Beatitudes)”? You may enjoy it as well. I have written a few other satirical pieces that have been published, but I do not have it up on the blog yet. I will get them up in the near future. Thanks for reading!

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